A digestible deep dive into a better work-life

Really Good Work Advice

Hey friend,

Happy Monday 🤗

As a reminder, I've moved this newsletter over to Substack (and renamed it!) but in order for you to have full-access, you'll need to take the following steps:

1. ​Subscribe to Substack (I lowered the price!)
2. Email me a copy of your receipt
3. I'll cancel your subscription to Really Good Work Advice

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In one week, if I still haven't heard from you, I'll assume you don't want to receive any emails at all from me and will go ahead and cancel your subscription, no questions asked.

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In the meantime, check out this week's essay: How to Make Big Decisions With Confidence which is about how past disappointments can make you seek expensive insurance policies (degrees, certifications, permissions) against future uncertainty instead of trusting what your body already knows.

I've included the Progress Plan 👇 since I know you're not (yet!) subscribed to Substack and it technically has a paywall over there :)

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Progress Plan

7 Days to Break Your Decision Deadlock

This isn't about making the "right" choice or finding more information—it's about excavating the wisdom you had before fear started making your decisions for you. Each day targets a different layer of paralysis, from surface-level pros and cons to the deep belief that choosing wrong will ruin everything. Every exercise takes 20 minutes or less because clarity isn't about adding more analysis to your overthinking—it's about changing who you're letting vote. By day seven, you'll have separated real risk from ego fear, reclaimed evidence of your own capability, and made the choice that your body has been trying to make all along.

This Progress Plan is based on the post, How to Make Decisions With Confidence​

Day 1: The Fear Inventory (20 min total)

Morning excavation (15 min): Your fears aren't facts—they're stories. Time to separate them:

• What am I afraid will happen if I choose Path A? (List every catastrophic thought)
• What am I afraid will happen if I choose Path B? (Every worst-case scenario)
• What am I afraid will happen if I don't choose at all? (The cost of paralysis)
• Which fear is about actual consequences vs. ego/image/what others think?
• What would I choose if I knew no one was watching?
• Complete this sentence: "The real reason I can't decide is because _____"

Evening body check (5 min): Notice where fear lives in your body:

• Read each fear out loud, slowly
• When you say "Path A," where does your body contract?
• When you say "Path B," where does it expand?
• Which fears make your chest tighten vs. which make you curious?
• Your body knows the difference between real danger and ego fear

Day 2: The Success Evidence Review (20 min)

Morning proof session (15 min): You've already succeeded without permission. Map the evidence:

The Credential-Free Wins:

• List 5 times you succeeded without the degree/certification/validation you're now seeking
• For each win: What did you have instead of formal credentials?
• Which of these wins are you most proud of? Why?
• What skills did you develop through unconventional paths?

The Pattern Recognition:

• What do all your wins have in common?
• When do you perform best—with structure or freedom?
• What resources do you actually need vs. think you need?
• Complete: "I succeed best when I have _____"

Evening affirmation (5 min): Write and speak this aloud three times: "I have already proven I can [specific success]. I don't need permission to [next step]. My track record speaks for itself."

Notice: Where does resistance show up when you say this? That's where your work is.

Day 3: The Failure Goldmine (20 min)

Morning archaeology (15 min): That "failure" haunting you? It's unprocessed wisdom:

The Failure Reframe:

• Describe your biggest relevant failure in detail
• What did this failure teach you about what you need?
• What systems/support would have prevented this?
• How did this failure actually protect you from something worse?
• What are you now qualified to do BECAUSE of this experience?

The Next Time Scenario:

• If this exact opportunity appeared tomorrow, what would you do differently?
• What would you need in place to say yes?
• Who would you need to become to handle it?
• What story about this failure are you ready to release?

Evening integration (5 min): Rewrite your failure story: "My biggest 'failure' was actually research. It showed me [specific lesson]. Now I know exactly what to build: [specific next step]."

Place this somewhere you'll see it daily.

Day 4: The Incremental Test (20 min)

Morning experiment design (15 min): Stop theorizing. Start testing:

The Minimum Viable Choice:

• What's the smallest possible test of Path A? (One class? One conversation? One week?)
• What's the smallest possible test of Path B? (One client? One project? One trial?)
• What specific result would tell you to go further?
• What specific result would tell you to stop?
• By what exact date will you run this test?

The Risk Assessment:

• What's the actual (not imagined) worst outcome of this test?
• Could you recover from that outcome? How quickly?
• What's the best realistic outcome?
• Is the potential upside worth the recoverable downside?

Afternoon action (5 min): Take ONE micro-step toward testing:

• Send the email you've been drafting in your head
• Sign up for the free trial/intro class/coffee chat
• Make it so small that NOT doing it would be ridiculous
• Notice: How does action immediately shift paralysis?

Day 5: The Shadow Choice Check (20 min)

Morning truth session (15 min): Whose life are you actually choosing?

The Approval Inventory:

• Who am I trying to impress with this choice? (Name specific people)
• What would my parents want me to choose? Why?
• What would the "successful" version of me choose?
• What would the truest version of me choose?
• Whose disappointment am I trying to avoid?

The Voice Separation:

• Write down what each person above would say about each path
• Circle the voices that aren't yours
• What would YOU say if no one else's opinion mattered?
• Complete: "I'm really choosing between _____ and _____" (hint: it's usually between safety and growth)

Evening release (5 min): The approval purge:

• Write each name whose approval you're seeking on separate paper
• For each, write: "I release your opinion about my choice"
• Burn or tear up each paper
• Say aloud: "I choose for me, not for you"

Day 6: The Both/And Exploration (20 min)

Morning creativity session (15 min): Binary thinking is lazy thinking:

The Third Option Discovery:

• How could I get the benefits of both paths without the downsides?
• What would a creative combination look like?
• Who has successfully merged these paths? How?
• What would the unconventional approach be?
• What if the choice isn't permanent? What if I could pivot?

The Timeline Hack:

• Could I do Path A for 6 months, then Path B?
• Could I do both simultaneously at smaller scales?
• What if this is a "right now" choice, not a "forever" choice?
• How might Path A prepare me for Path B (or vice versa)?

Evening possibility (5 min): Write three "What if I could..." statements:

• What if I could [impossible-seeming combination]?
• What if I could [have benefit without cost]?
• What if I could [unconventional timeline]?

Let these marinate overnight. Your subconscious is smarter than your conscious mind.

Day 7: The Decision Declaration (20 min)

Morning commitment (15 min): Today, you choose:

The Body Compass Final Check:

• Close your eyes. Breathe deeply three times.
• Imagine walking through door A. How does your body respond?
• Imagine walking through door B. What changes in your body?
• Which path makes you feel lighter, even if scarier?
• Trust the expansion, not the contraction.

The Declaration Preparation:

• Based on this week, what are you ready to release?
• What are you ready to claim?
• What support do you need to move forward?
• Who needs to know about this decision?
• When will you take the first real step?

Evening ceremony (5 min): Make it official:

• Light a candle
• Write your decision on paper: "I choose [path] because [body wisdom reason]"
• Say aloud: "I trust my choice. I trust my timing. I trust my ability to adjust as I learn."
• Blow out the candle. Fold the paper. Keep it.
• The decision is made. The overthinking ends now.

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Your First Month Post-Decision Toolkit

When doubt creeps back in:

• Return to Day 3's rewritten failure story
• Remember: Doubt is just fear in a convincing costume
• Ask: "Is this new information or old fear?"
• Truth: You can adjust your path, not just abandon it

When others question your choice:

• Return to Day 5's approval inventory
• Remember: They're projecting their fears, not seeing your future
• Try: "I appreciate your concern. I've thought this through."
• Boundary: You don't owe anyone an explanation

When the path gets hard:

• Return to Day 4's minimum viable test
• Remember: Hard doesn't mean wrong
• Adjust: Make the next step smaller, not the dream
• Truth: Everything worthwhile is hard sometimes

When you wonder "what if":

• Return to Day 6's both/and exploration
• Remember: You can often add the other path later
• Consider: What has this path already taught you?
• Peace: The other path will still exist if you need it

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The 30-Day Implementation Protocol

Week 1-2: Commitment Fortification

• Daily: 5-minute morning check-in with your decision
• Practice: "I chose this because..." statements
• Action: One small step toward your path daily
• Boundary: Decline one thing that doesn't align with your choice

Week 3-4: Momentum Building

• Increase: From small steps to meaningful progress
• Connect: Find 3 people on similar paths
• Document: Keep a "proof it's working" list
• Celebrate: Every small win that validates your choice

Monthly Check-In Questions:

• What has this choice already given me?
• What fear from Day 1 proved to be false?
• How has my body wisdom been confirmed?
• What would I tell someone in my Day 1 position?
• Am I ready to increase my commitment to this path?

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The Deeper Truth

You're not stuck because you lack information. You're stuck because you're trying to think your way through something that requires feeling your way through.

Sarah knew business school felt heavy and contracting. Her body was screaming "no" while her brain kept saying "but maybe..." That's not confusion—that's clarity being overridden by fear.

Your body has been voting this whole time. Every time you think about Path A and feel exhausted—that's a vote. Every time Path B makes you nervous but alive—that's a vote.

The decision isn't hiding. You're just not listening.

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Remember This

That paralysis you're feeling? It's not protecting you from making the wrong choice. It's preventing you from making ANY choice, which is always the wrongest choice.

Every day you don't decide is a day you're deciding to stay stuck. That's still a choice—just a passive one that gives your power away to circumstance instead of claiming it for yourself.

The path that makes your body lighter—even if your brain thinks it's riskier—is usually right. Not because it's easier, but because it's yours.

You don't need more information. You don't need more opinions. You don't need more time.

You need to trust what you already know.

The decision you're avoiding has already been made in your body. This week is just about letting your brain catch up.

Start with Day 1 tonight. In seven days, you'll have chosen.

And a week from now, you'll wonder why you waited so long.

That's not naive optimism. That's the pattern of every good decision—it seems impossible until it's inevitable.

Your inevitable is waiting. Time to choose it.