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Claire from Ladies Get Paid

How to ask your network for help (the right way.)


We make ambition easy.

Hey Reader,
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Asking for help is hard. We worry what the other person will think of us; that we're incompetent, or worse, a burden. Plus, admitting that we need help, makes our need for help real.

There's no more fantasy, just facts.

And the fact is, I've needed help. With my son's medical bills and my wife caregiving full-time, our family is in a financially precarious position. In short: the inbound for my coaching clients and speaking gigs dried up. My ego had to move aside.

So I compiled a list of 60 "portals", people in my network who themselves are very well-networked. Then I carefully crafted an email that I believe strikes the balance of seeking support and offering value.

After I pressed send, I pressed record and created a video..for you! I walk you through what I wrote and how you can adapt it to your needs. In this video, you'll learn how to:

βœ… Write a BCC email that feels personal and authentic

βœ… Ask for help without feeling awkward

βœ… Structure your request with clear, actionable steps

βœ… Offer value while maintaining professional boundaries

βœ… Make it easy for people to help you with copy-paste templates

βœ… The importance of setting clear expectations

βœ… Demonstrate that you respect their time

βœ… Offer reciprocal value
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video preview​

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Hopefully, this is the exact boost you need to put yourself out there, whether you're asking for help or just doing something vulnerable.

We got this - together πŸ’ͺ

x Claire
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In this week's newsletter:

✍️ Really Good Work Advice: How to Alchemize Shit Into Gold

🎧 Podcast: "I Keep Hearing No - How Do I Pivot Careers Without Giving Up?"

πŸ—“οΈ Meetup: On February 2nd, join our goal-setting and accountability event to prep for a great month ahead

πŸ› οΈ Tools for a Better Work-Life: Get unstuck and unstressed

How to Alchemize Shit Into Gold

An excerpt from last week's edition of Really Good Work Advice​


Life used to be easy - for a little while anyway. But starting at age nine when my parents split the family up and I was living with friends for a few months, I quickly realized that you better learn to swim if you don't want to sink. I learned it fast.

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Life kept throwing curveballs at me, each one a sucker punch harder than the last. A divorce. A lawsuit. Business on the brink of bankruptcy. Burnout. Massive debt. Medical crisis. Existential crisis. The list goes on.

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And yet, when I was flat on my bank or curled up in a fetal position, each time little Claire inside me would whisper, "Don't just take it. Don't let them win." I had to somehow, someway, transform the shit into gold. And I did.

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πŸ’« A divorce led me to come out and meet the love of my life.

πŸ’« A lawsuit led me to a book deal.

πŸ’« Burnout led to sustainable work habits.

πŸ’« Being broke made me heal my relationship with money.

πŸ’« Watching my son endure two open heart surgeries made me open my own heart.

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I want to call myself out for a second, however. "Led to" sounds too passive and "made me" isn't quite right either. I believe this is what happened:

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I hit rock bottom so hard; I simply didn’t have enough energy to indulge what wasn’t working.

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With my son's surgeries, I was like a friggin' nub: a raw bundle of nerves, exposed, electric, vulnerable AF. I frankly didn't have the capacity to overthink or overanalyze, it was simply one foot in front of the other, in the direction of the next best thing that would heal my son - and myself. Creating a parent support group, writing a memoir, giving speeches at medical conferences...it didn't require energy because it was actually GIVING me energy.

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I'm aware that that's not "normal" for everyone. My sister-in-law texted me, "I don't think I could've done it" which got me thinking: I'm not special. I'm just intentional.

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And so I reviewed all of my life's obstacles and was able to chart a direct path to all of my life's most amazing experiences. It became clear that the ups cannot happen without the downs. So I asked myself:

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Is it possible to create a process of healing that leverages suffering for something better? Someone better? That someone being us.

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This edition of RGWA will go through a six-phase process (plus three critical questions) I identified to help you transform obstacles into opportunities, or as I like to say, shit into gold.

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But first, let's define shit. It's anything that disrupts your life with a negative impact. Not getting the job you wanted, losing a loved one, a breakup, a breakdown. It’s an experience that destabilizes you. It's scary and you hate it.

So you resist.

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You resist by avoiding your feelings, avoiding difficult conversations (with others and yourself). You rationalize, react impulsively, over-analyze and over-indulge.

In short, you make things worse.

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We compound the chaos, internalizing the external disruption, and in that, we literally embody pain. That’s why our bodies carry so much tension - it’s all that energy, inside us. No amount of massages or β€œself-care” is going to help. At least not in the long-term.

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That's why you have to go through each of these six phases before you can leverage them to your advantage. If you skip any of the phases, it’s an in-the-moment shortcut that feels better but won’t yield the lasting change you want and deserve. It also veers into toxic positivity which is like a bandaid on a deeper wound.

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To facilitate this process, I recommend:

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βœ… Get a special journal and pen

βœ… Create an β€œalter to you” with talismans and childhood photo(s)

βœ… Carve out specific times during your day - setting an alarm helps) to reflect on whatever phase you’re in

βœ… Connect with at least one other person who has experienced this - you don’t have to know them, it could be a book you’re reading or a person you’re following on social

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"I Keep Hearing No - How Do I Pivot My Career Without Giving Up?"
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show
"I Keep Hearing β€˜No’—How Do...
Jan 28 Β· Money Rehab with Nicole...
44:41
Spotify Logo
Β 
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Today, you'll be a fly on the wall for one of my coaching sessions with an anonymous caller who needs help making a career pivot.

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This caller, we’ll call her Katie, has been interviewing for positions in a new field, but keeps getting rejected in favor of other candidates with more traditional experience… and now, she feels defeated.

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I give Katie tips on how to frame her experience to show that her skills really are transferable and that the learning curve will be minimal. I also share strategies around how to be more creative in finding new opportunities.

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This episode is for anyone who is considering a career pivot or is in the throes of a job search and is losing steam. Don't worry, I have you covered πŸ˜‰
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PS Interested in being coached by me? Book a free exploratory call here!​

You're Invited: Goal-Setting Meetup
February 2nd, 5-6p ET
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I'm still buzzing with all that energy from our Better Year sessions this month that I don't want it to end!

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I want to invite you to a BONUS goal-setting meetup this Sunday, February 2nd at 5p ET, where you'll put into motion everything you learned. It's something I will be hosting every month for Really Good Work Advice subscribers but everyone is welcome to this first one.
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Two quick things to prepare:

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  1. ​Your major goal for February. Fill-in-the-blank: "If I can do/have/feel [THIS], it will make a meaningful impact on the quality of my work-life."
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  2. Your biggest obstacle. List all the things that are currently in your way of reaching your goal and identify the one that if removed, would have a domino effect on everything else.

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During the session, I'll help you create an action plan of next steps plus connect you with other women to hold you accountable until our next meetup :)

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It's free to attend and I'll have a special gift waiting for all my job seekers (or potential job seekers!) I won't be recording these to maintain everyone's privacy so hopefully you can make it live 🀞

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Tools for a Better Work-Life


Get more done in less time with less stress, and less overwhelm.
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A weekly 10-minute action plan to build a critical skill for a better work-life.
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Personalized support to get you moving faster to reach your goals more easily.
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Eavesdrop on real coaching sessions as clients navigate tricky work-life situations.
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x Claire

I help you reach success without self-sacrifice. Learn more here.​

PS Want to reach 50k people and support my work? It's easy, sponsor this newsletter! ​

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Claire from Ladies Get Paid

πŸ’°Hi, I'm Claire Wasserman: Coach, Speaker, Author, and Founder of Ladies Get Paid. Our newsletters, podcast, and coaching programs help you increase your worth inside and out.

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